Urrgh, I’m almost a fool. I have to use these Sweet Valley High titles in order to grab your attention. That said, “almost a fool” refers only to the fact that its April Fools tomorrow rather than any intellectual anguish I might be having over my upcoming exams. I’ve almost been a fool millions of times, from fake £20 notes to bogus prizes…just dont trick me tomorrow because I will fall for it.
This pretty amazing (cake vs.) pie chart from This is why you’re fat has caught my foolish attention:
…as has everything else vaguely sweet recently. Weird craving for a proper, gen-u-ine New York cheescake, actually; one of those which looks like a round French cheese and tastes like one too. If anyone wants to bake me one then please go ahead.
Anyways, onto some higher culture. I have enjoyed such cultivated televisual viewing of late, including The Undercover Princesses on BBC3.
A follow-up to the equally cringeworthy culture-clash comedy of The Undercover Princes, this series saw three ethnically-diverse but equally stereotypical “royals” – the Bugandan with a shapely behind and a taste for market-stall weave, the shy, sari-wearing Indian wallflower and the whiter-than-white Europop heiress from Germany, who almost didn’t count as foreign – looking for love in the UK. So, the BBC sent the trio to our culture capital of Essex and watched asmadness ensued. One of Uganda’s princesses, nicknamed Cinderella, found Caribbean match Paul (Paw-ul) on a trip to Asda for mushrooms in a surprisingly tidy scene which was typical set-up fare. Meanwhile, sweet-natured asian princess Aaliya went on a series of disappointing dates with men who looked like Crimewatch-paedo-cut-outs for conversations about the weather, where we almost expected to hear Mad World dubbed over her plight. Eeyorl-liah was a nice girl but socially inept when it came to the opposite sex, and scuppered one of her dates by getting claustrophobia…whilst wearing a helmet. Doh! Instead of love, we got more BBC subtitles over anyone who wasn’t from Essex and a horrible soundtrack which even featured “world’s most overused and dramatic tearjerker” Kissing You by Des’ree. Yes, the song from Romeo+Juliet. A highlight was Xenia from Germany, however, whose much-hyped “relationship” with hairdresser Elliott involved much retarded singing, impressionism and crap dancing. Put her anywhere else and I think this woman would have been labelled a fag hag. Hilarious stuff as always from the BBC’s digital stable, but can we please have some proper princesses next time…this lot really lacked authenticity!
High Renaissance Man – exclusive –
Yes, THIS is what the title of the blog is about! HIGHLY CULTURED MEN!
Vice ran this pretty amazing picture of JFK in a series of hats for next month’s issue…just to cover myself legally I should point out that the pic below is by Tara Sinn of http://www.babydinosaureyes.com/, and it is just so cute. Especially the top hat…can someone please Cafe Press this into a mug/t-shirt/babygrow (with permission ofc).
And here is my horrific illustration for the following feature. I forbid anyone to Cafe Press this:
It’s been less than 2 months since Mr Totally Tom – that’s Mr Totally Tom Stourton and Mr Totally Tom Palmer to you and I – launched their comedy short High Renaissance Man on Youtube. Part one of four is above, and given my damning review of a BBc 3 programme (also above), I advise that our controllors take note: this is what TV needs.
The two Toms – who have somewhat sarcastically declared that they want BBC’s “pinkies”, that’s £50 notes to you and me – have been friends since the tender age of 12, when they met at a sleepover (everybody say: awww!)
Described by Michael Hessletine as “Evelyn Waugh on acid” (100% true quotation), the duo take their inspiration from Garth Meranghi’s Dark Place and Brass Eye among other series’, although this Bristol-based mockumentary is all their own work, and they strongly deny “copying” anyone. In fact, their influences peek through rather than being worn on a collective sleeve, surely the mark of subtle genius. Thanks to the way in which universities are “interlinked” through Facebook, High Renaissance Man has gone down a treat on the interwebs – probably because James Talbot-Smith (Stourton) is the perfectly recognisable Oxbridge-reject turning his hand to uni pursuits such as event promotion with his trademark awkwardness. If Abercrombie did philosophy degrees…
That’s enough from me anyways…let’s read James’ exclusive diary for hannahjdavies.com!
The diary of James – by Mr Totally Tom
D e a r D i a r y,
J a m e s h e r e a g a i n. F i r s t o f a l l, a s y o u m a y h a v e n o t i c e d, I h a v e j u s t f o u n d a f u c k i n g
l e a n f o n t t o u s e f o r m y d i a r y e n t r i e s. M a k e s i t l o o k l i k e a n o l d s c h o o l t y p e w r i t e r – a n d
i t u s e s u p l e s s i n k.
Spiked Mathew’s tea with seven grams of Mephedrone this morning. He has an exam later AND his parents are taking us for lunch after. Would love to be a fly on the wall for that one! Even though I will be sort of. He’d better pay me back.
Speaking of pranks, expenses scandal broke out today – so fierce! In a bit of trouble with Dad as I ordered a duck house on his account for one of my nights – he is soooooo angry. Also v. bum-out as has ruined my Duck and Bass night – apparently freedom of expression has been banned by the government! Sorry, didn’t realize Tony Blair had collaborated with the Nazis! (Not! – as in I’m being sarcastic not as in I think Nazis actually are actually in power in real life).
Anywayz, until the next time we meet, see you tomorrow dear diary.
Yours truly truthfully,
Me….James.
*Thanks to the two Toms for their help with this feature…now go and watch all four parts of High Renaissance Man on Youtube!
<br>
LIKE A DRUG
Up on VBS.tv right now, you can click here to watch the first part of the Vice Guide to Film, on Mexico’s Narco Cinema, from their popular internet TV station (you might remember me talking about another VBS production, Swansea Love Story, in a previous post).
I digress: in this series, Vice will be exploring some lesser-known cinematic genres from across the globe, as co-founder Shane Smith and creative director Eddy Moretti explore the relationship between drugs and B-movies in Mexico, Korea and Japan. It’s described it as a foray into the low budget, seedy, fast-paced, straight-to-DVD genre inspired by (and often funded by) Mexico’s ultraviolent drug cartels. This culture-packed production is essential viewing for all Vice-lovers and beyond, as it also touches on the bizarre pagan patron saint of drug dealers…and a music genre based about trafficking! Throw your guidebooks in the bin, grab un sics (yes, thats a six pack of beer in spanish…spanglish) and click onto VBS.tv instead…
Til next month, adieu (actually, I’m going to be working with Artrocker on Underage Easter festival next week so that might pop up here too)
Happy new year. I mean it. At the beginning of last decade we were all too busy wondering whether all of our computers would crash and chaos would ensue. Ooh, and it was the beginning of a new century, a new millennium, how extremely novel. 2010, by comparison, snuck up on us like an itchy throat leading to a flu. Yes, I have been bed-ridden due to a horrific flu for the past few weeks, which is when I saw the year ticking away with extreme alacrity. Christmas was pretty good – Mad Men and 30 Rock box-sets of course – but something about 2010 was strangely scary. I started listening to Blur’s ‘End of the Century’ everyday in pensive anticipation before realising that it wasn’t the end of a century at all. It wasn’t even the end of a decade with a particular scent. I thought about all of the cool stuff that has happened since 2000, and none of it really jumped out at me as original. In the 2000s we recycled music, films and books. We remade really good things into not so good things, like Psycho. Even the top 30 films of the decade featured just two originals . Anyways, I digress. I have loved the past 10 years so here is my review:
2000
The year when giants of mainstream metal Metallica sued poor little college boys Napster (future millionaires cough cough). Also the year when Madonna brought out the electronic smash ‘Music’. I’m not sure if I knew what the bourgeoisie was when I was 8, but hell did this tune sound fresh. It still does a little. Madge helped the anti-piracy ship by getting pretty damn angry when this song was leaked on the internet four months early. Can’t mention rebellion in a song and then get angry over errrm rebellion, can you? But still she can do no wrong in my eyes.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: ‘Beautiful Day’ by U2. Yes, it’s the ‘football song’ thanks to our ITV. Yes, it wears pretty thin, pretty quickly…but Bono and co’s ability to create arena anthems full of optimism and pretension is second to none. Philosophical father of music, Michael ‘Losing My Religion, Everybody Hurts’ Stipe stepped off the moral high ground for a second to declare that he wished he’d written the song himself. Bono returned the favour by praising REM’s ‘Reveal’ the following year, but REM haven’t made a record so full of gritty personality and optimism since Shiny Happy People. In 1991. Carpe diem, Mike.
Also love:
2001
The iPod launched in 2001 to much Daily Mail hype. I was still in primary school, so I wasn’t in the first batch of white-headphone-wearers who were mugged for their £200 jukeboxes. ‘A glorified Walkman’ according to my mum…but did a Walkman have Music Quiz, Brickbreaker and a cool b&w screen? Thought not. Too cool, even though there are four ugly control buttons on iPod snr (later removed and integrated into the click wheel). Little did we know that everyone would have an iPod a couple of years later, and prices would drop as a result.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: A huge loss was felt in the world of R&B when soulful sweetheart Aaliyah died aged just 22. I remember being on the motorway as a little un and hearing a news bulletin about her death in a plane crash and feeling really, properly sad despite my geographical location (somewhere in the South of a little island called England). A massive talent had passed away before reaching her prime, and the world mourned her to the sound of ‘More Than A Woman’ from her eponymous, posthumous album which topped the charts in this year. Passion, Instant…a timeless tale of sexy suggestion and no submission from La Haughton.
Also love:
2002
September 11th 2001 was a tragic moment for the whole of the world, and it led comic-book clerk Gerard Way – who at the time couldn’t sing and play guitar at the same time – to form a foetus which later became the phenomenal, global emo spawn ‘My Chemical Romance’. I know I just said ‘carpe diem’ but carpe-ing by starting a band aged 22 with little experience? They were signed in record time and, from 2002 onwards, alt-kids worldwide from Philadelphia to the Philippines clung onto the new breed of dark heroism… and the rest is history.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Sk8er Boi by Avril Lavinge. I don’t care if you’re laughing, Sk8er Boi pretty much summed up every clichéd ‘she’s out of my league’ love story ever and delivered it to us complete with a backing track that sounded suspiciously like one of those ‘play along’ ones from a Guitar magazine tape. She half-talked, half-sung her way through what I thought was the antithesis to a bubblegum pop song with its narrative of kiss-chaste between a ballet-dancing girl (read: tease) with friends who ‘stuck up their (presumably collective) nose’ at a sk8er boi (yes, we had just discovered texting too). As it turns out, the black-clad, three-chord-playing Avril was actually a blonde in disguise, but we wouldn’t find that out for a few years so let’s just remember the way things were.
Also love:
2003
It was Mrs Robinson Revisited when Simon and Garfunkel embarked on a reunion tour in 2003. Also returning, albeit after a shorter hiatus of two years in 2003 was our Britney with ‘In The Zone’. It was not her best, but shall surely be remembered if only for the graphic ode to Britters’ solo bedroom exploits ‘Touch of My Hand’. Of course, its nothing in comparison to 3 – released sex, sorry, six years later – but it caused a stir at the time, as did squeaky-clean Spears’ VMA kiss with Madonna and Christina Aguilera. The transformation, which had started with the relatively tame wannabe-subjugation of ‘I’m A Slave 4U’ was complete, and set the tone for the decade when Britney would become a bride, mother, mother and bride again, not to mention a shadow of her wholesome 90s persona.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Delta Goodrem first bounced onto my radar as Nina Tucker on Neighbours. Sadly, I didn’t even need to Wikipedia that fact. The Down Under Diva was destined for stardom like plenty of Ramsay Street residents before her, and in a strange twist from other actress-turned-singer alumni she actually played a singer in the programme whilst signed to Sony (a trick later reused to launch Caitlin ‘Rachel’ Stasey from schoolgirl to star in 2008/9). Unfortunately Delta had to leave the soap when she was diagnosed with a rare cancer, Hodgkin’s lymphoma, but she recovered and rose to popularity with ‘Born To Try’, a song debuted on the soap. The saccharine-sweet piano and nasal tones gained Delta a UK number 3, which can surely only mean she was robbed. In a strange twist of fate, she ended up with a pop idol from across the globe, Westlife’s Brian ‘Kerry Katona’s leftovers’ McFadden and the pair are currently engaged.
Also love:
– NME’s top song of the decade, can you believe it.
2004
The year I went to high school. It makes me feel nervous even now..all of those people, the noise, the crowded spaces, the canteen queues that seemed to stretch for miles in the baking sunshine and the possibility of getting lost on my way to the toilets. Pantera guitarist ‘Dimebag’ Darrell was shot dead in this year by a mentally ill fan, although it would take me a few more years to discover the genius of 1992’s ‘Vulgar Display of Power’. It was also the year when No Doubt’s Gwen Stefani hit the mainstream with her reggae-rockstar status invigorated with new-found R&B/Harajuku funk fusion to create Love.Angel.Music.Baby, kicking off a L.A.M.B franchise which continues to grow today with a clothes line and (pretty good) perfume.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Mormon rockgod Brandon Flowers was an 80s dream as he characterised a jealous boyfriend in ‘Mr Brightside’, and when The Killers debuted on Saturday morning kids tv I resented the goody-two-shoes aesthetic of this whiney, shy little man. Who on earth was Brandon Flowers and would he be all over cool lists and future charts with his bashful eau de anti-fame like an American Chris Martin? ‘Mr Brightside’ answered my perplexities with a simple YES with its perfect composition and background-music capabilities. We could choose to listen to this swirl of deliciously repetitive electronic guitar and bass or simply stick it on in the background whilst playing The Sims. And I quite liked that.
Also love:
2005
Kanye West warned us about Golddiggers who don’t mess with no ‘broke niggers’ in 2005 with help from a cast of (deceased) musical legends, a tiny Sheffield band exploded with their odds-on bet that we’d look good on the dancefloor and a cast led by a flower-print catsuit wearing Brazilian ordered us to “make love and listen to death from above”. But there was also a Maroon 5 obsession on my part, probably started due to my obsession with another A Lavinge.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: I first heard ‘Sugar We’re Going Down’ by Fall Out Boy whilst watching an MTV2 chart show, something I used to do pretty often once I had my iPod, iTunes and wanted to waste my iNheritance in advance. One of the first songs I downloaded was this slice of American alternative culture. I hadn’t listened to The Shins or Brand New yet (forgive me, Jesus) but I really liked Fall Out Boy and this schoolboy heartache in a strangely high key for a pop-rock song was comforting. I downloaded a few remixes. I ordered a t-shirt…from America. If only I’d had a premonition – by the end of the 2000s FOB would be trying the R&B route too, and I’d be sleeping in that fetching yellow top. A couple of years later I’d understand those John Hughes refs.
Also love:
2006
My best friend and I used to convene at my house on a Monday after school, and this changed to Friday sometime around 2006. One day – either Monday or Friday, but I will put my bets on Monday because hours of sorting out press releases at NME taught me that most albums are released on a Monday – we raced home. No time for Ritter Sport or gossiping by the funeral directors, no we actually ran home. At home there was a brown package with that familiar black writing – Amazon.com, Amazon.fr, etc etc. We quickly gleaned that it was from Amazon. Even though I had recently bought an iPod, nothing could’ve compared to my excitement as I unwrapped Red Hot Chili Pepper’s first offering in four years, ‘Stadium Arcadium’ – the first album I had pre-ordered from the internet and the most eagerly anticipated one I have ever wanted. Oh, the disappointment as we discovered the 2 disc mess. Since year 5 I had been ridiculously into the Peppers, probably egged on by a favourite Kiwi teacher who rolled into school wearing a moth-eaten ‘By The Way’ t-shirt and chatted ‘Californication’ and calculators with us. The biggest hit was ‘Dani California’ as I could’ve predicted from this menagerie of sci-fi influences and country casuals, although ‘Storm In A Teacup’ sounded like a haka at a zoo (apologies to the Kiwi teacher).
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Naive – The Kooks. Oh, gosh it’s embarrassing now but for a little while we all loved Luke Pritchard. He was a pale, curly-haired little Lothario from Brighton who patronized a girl beyond belief with this ode to youthful nonchalance and could’ve been the face of a blood transfusion campaign. His pain showed through as he spoke of his adoration giving way to enlightenment: the girl (*cough*Katie Melua*cough) was naive despite her pretty face. Grossly overplayed, it wore thin after a while, once they – along with ‘rivals’ The View had bitten the dust (the busker trend didn’t really continue to top the charts after this point). Little did I know that I’d be jamming away to tales of ‘Wasted Little DJs at a little music festival called Reading in 2009.
Also love:
2007
There were – in my mind – some amazingly hot hits in this year. I discovered DANCE by Justice by way of MySpace (remember those days?) and one of my best friends came to school with Klaxons inked all over her hands. Such a shame that the aforementioned catsuit-wearer got her hands on one of the ‘Golden Skans’ boys but still. My love affair with late-night radio from about 2000 onwards meant I usually just got the best tunes from XFM, and LCD Soundsystem’s ‘North American Scum’ (ahhh haaa haaa) was glamourous, hip-shaking and more 80s than Brandon Flowers et al. One of NMEs picks of the decade, MIAs ‘Paper Planes’ was released for the first time, but we didn’t know it would go on to feature on the biggest film of the following year.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Radiohead laid it bare with ‘Nude’ from their revolutionarily-released ‘In Rainbows’. Creeps all over the world paid whatever they wanted to get their hands on the album, which included this unforgettable story with a haunting pessimistic quality. Sound familiar? Possibly, but Thom cut down on the lyrics and focused on the slow-burning instrumentals which made his band famous. The organic, tumultuous yet structured sound which is created warms like a fire at a campsite whilst remaining strangely frigid to the touch. It’s no soulful Karma Police and one interpretation could be that it is about altogether more dark matters, but it holds a link to the past through Yorke’s irreplaceable, fragile vocal.
Also love:
2008
The year where Katy Perry kissed a girl, liked it and hoped her boyfriend didn’t mind it. One of my opening posts for this very website, which you can find using the Archives on the right was all about how very annoying this song had become, but it was still hugely successful and helped to launch a career which has been all about fun, flirting and press coverage. Beyoncé was also turning the tables by wishing she was a boy, and X Factor songstress Leona Lewis surprised the musical world by covering..wait for it..Snow Patrol’s Run. A strange choice, but it was a hit here and in the US, pushing Lewis from Hackney to Hollywood.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Lollipop certified Lil Wayne as an ODB and also publicised that dreaded Auto Tune which has unfortunately become commonplace in all kinds of music over the past decade. However, it was so catchy that we didn’t care about the misogyny or magic behind this candy-sweet club tune. It was also a posthumous hit for rapper Static Major who produced tracks for artists, including – ironically – the also famed-in-death Aaliyah (see 2001). Explicit, ringtone-material fare but its popularity showed that Tha Carter could straddle between genres better than 2008’s rap/rock flop ‘Scream’, an album produced by Timbaland for Chris Cornell (a UK number 70).
Also love:
2009
So many brilliant albums were released in 2009. Blur reformed. Springsteen did Glasto (see my archives). Jacko died (see my archives). Lady Gaga burst onto the scene (see my archives). Somewhere in there Kanye (see 2005) even managed to hurt the feelings of a poor little country girl named Taylor Swift. Ok, so a lot of things happened and I wrote about a few of them, so I shall not just be lazy and recycle all of that here. I’ll just cut to the chase: my song of 2009.
hannahjdavies.com’s song of the year: Tik Tok by Ke$ha was essentially ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ on speed and Auto Tune. Someone stone me?
Oh Ke$ha, how misplaced my adoration might be. Vacuous ode to hedonism “Tik Tok” stuck two very manicured fingers up to frugality in a year which saw culls at independents and even some previously untouchable artists such as Marilyn Manson getting the boot from the majors. Along came a brazen blonde who didn’t have “a care in the world” but did have, in her own words, “plenty of beer”. She encouraged us to go to parties and get “a little bit tipsy”, and although this French (kiss) Revolution was a definite step backwards, some of us started to feel empowered by this sweet antichrist for modern feminism. Yes, she references P ‘sugar daddy’ Diddy and her concept of time is slightly awry…but Ke$ha, your poor oral hygiene (anyone for brushing their teeth with a bottle of Jack?) and Dixie overpronounication made 2009 a little bit more frivolous…like.
Also love:
HAVE A HAPPY DECADE EVERYONE. GRANDS BISOUS AND CHEERS IF YOU READ THE LIST,
x x x x
PS: Thanks to all my readers for helping me get a crazy 2,000-3,000 people a day onto my site a few exciting times in 2009! Cheers to all of the people who’ve helped me get published in 2008-9, and all of those I’ve bugged for directions, phone numbers or press passes. It’s really appreciated, and I hope to work with even more great people and organizations this decade.
If you’ve just discovered the magical ramblings and professional articles then hello, I’ m Hannah and I’m a wordaholic. Welcome back if you’re one of those who has commented, critiqued (or just laughed at me) over the past 12 months.
So, its been almost a year since I kicked things off; using this site in part as a way to share my truly random findings, my best music, fashion and lifestyle pearls and also to link to my work elsewhere. It has been met with complimets and confusion, so much so that I think it might be time to reorganize things a bit, and redefine… something I’m not going to start now, because I have two months worth of material to just offload here…
So here we are, catching up with the calamity.
I’ve been told to write in black from now on by a load of very valued readers, but my green font and pink background are part of what makes me the ‘Schindler’s List girl’ of music websites. Yes, I know that film was about the Nazis. Maybe I should’ve just stuck with a comment about my Daria-like cynicism.
Anyways, I haven’t enirely been slacking off from writing in recent months. Firstly, I did another truly fantastic work placement at NME which meant listening to lots of new music and helping out in the most beautiful building in London* where anything can happen! (*my view entirely).
Inevitably, there are mundane, everyday goings on (stalkerish post, terrible demos, arguments over deadlines), but not many work experience girls can say that they’ve got to swoon over The Drums in person, who popped by to record a session for NME Radio. The Kink(s)y pair were a Stroke(s) away from me (those were much better in my head)..I digress: I was three metres away from the sparkly Speakeasy-city charm of the polished-and-deconstrcted duo. They are a dream of 1950s/60s surf soul and self-conscious noughties prose and repition. Choirs and restless brass accompaniment courtesy of these beach boys put me at a night spent in passionate conversation on a Brooklyn fire escape in swirls of iced (latte) rain. I hate on the bougeousie far too much for my own good, but The Drums are romantic and possess – for fear of tarring them with the same brush as CSS, The Shins, Fleet Foxes – a future-forward cult cool on tracks such as Instruct Me which is usurped by mixtape grainy licks of grunge rhyme”Submarine”, which seems to cite The Polyphonic Spree and Placebo.
Oh yes, and they look like they should be working at A&F.
Proper highlight material there, as well as the fact that I got to present an opening for a Roland Eye Session (a new performance venture from the guys at Roland Amps/Keyboards) and attend an unforgettable session with hardcore sweethearts Failsafe.
The boys performed their Kerrang anthem ‘Only If We Learn’ as we glided over London in our spacious pod. Not only did they give a stunning, intimate rendition, they were also some of the nicest guys I’ve yet to meet. It was easy to cast aside the Metalhammer image of a 2000s metal band being a masked gang of animal-sacrificing Viking warriors, greasy-haired axe-wielders or a pre-pubescent suicide forum with fringes…and feel what I call ‘soulcore. Metal music, courtsesy of the soul. Fellow worky Anna and I couldn’t believe our luck, and typically we spent most of the journey snapping panoramic shots on our BlackBerrys and getting soundbites about the band’s next gig which was the following evening in Newport.
And our express tickets meant absolutely no queuing. Haa.
Check Failsafe out here, and keep your eyes peeled for the video of the session which will hopefully be up here very soon!
I haven’t been totally slacking from the writing side of things, however, and I reviewed the BBC Emerging proms for my friends over at Converse Music last month – you can find that review here !
By sheer coincidence, the gig I was reviewing (which, I unfortunately didn’t enjoy at all, see above!) was at the Roundhouse on the same night Failsafe supported Bowling For Soup. Would’ve rather been with the latter bands.
I also wrote a little piece on my favourite fanzine, The Pix, run by the incredible journalist, DJ, fashion goddess of i-D Hanna Hanra. Yes, I would love to meet her, and not just because we have the same name bar one letter.
This picture pretty much confirms her status as like, SUPERCOOL…like. Anyhow, here is what I wrote – flippantly and sans title – for her fabulous website.
Here’s a review of a single I did whilst at NME. Be warned…its not too pretty:
The Duke and the King
Summer Morning Rain (Loose Music/Universal)
What exactly does ergonomic mean in relation to keyboard design? That is a question I pondered as I struggled to capture a sense of creation behind the faceless and self-indulgent mundanity that is ‘Summer Morning Rain’. Optimistically billing themselves as glam, folk and soul, these Later alumni deliver no more than unremarkable join-the-dots guitar which borrows more than slightly from Tom Petty’s ‘Free Falling’. Cliché seeps from every apparently cultish Brooklynite pore via sweet but ultimately dry observations. If there is one noble thing about The Duke and the King, it is their ability to endow the masses with genuinely comforting, uncontroversial blues. However, they seem to be swaying in the middle of the same dead-end dirt track inhabited by tributes, buskars and other imitators…and for this they will never be the raconteurs an original fairytale of New York.
Don’t think I’ve ever written a positive single review.
I went on a journalism course this month, run by the brilliant Debate Chamber, which confirmed for me that I definitely want to keep slagging people off writing and commenting and thinking, and ultimately that I WANT TO BE A JOURNALIST! Very useful course either way, would really recommend it to anyone thinking of joining the media.
Anyways, I’m going to have to get some sleep, feeling pretty vile and in need of these
those:
(yeah, they’re limited edition Snoopy tissues I went crazy for aged 12, ok?!)
and this
(the beautiful Converse/heel combo I’ve seen about London town, possibly an asian copy of a catwalk style but they are buff…even if they smell of pvc and polystyrene, and the heels might break at an awkward moment resuling in severe injury/loss of feeling in your toes).
Merry Christmas .. I’ll be back to give a cynical overview of the world very soon.
Yours,
x x x x
Currently watching: The Thick Of It, Sat, 10:40, BBC 2. Hilarious, sharp, culture-rich, punchy even after the commercial success of cinematic spin-off In The Loop…if it were a person, I would marry it, if only for the witty banter and eventual inheritance.
Currently reading: Hippo Eats Dwarf by Alex Bosse…a detailed look at Urban Legends through the ages. Well-written, if not slightly alarmist with its gruesome tales of the link between human hair and soy sauce. Pass the bento bucket!
I’ll leave you with a image from my favvvvvvvvvourite website of the year, thisiswhyyourefat.com. Hot Apple Bacon Turnover With Icing is wrong, dirty and makes me so very hungry.
Evening readers, and welcome to my monthly cocktail of filth and stories about the inside of d-lister’s noses. I’m sure there’s no incriminating white fluff up there, girl who won Pop Idol in 2005 etc etc.
Anyways, it struck me as odd that I’ve literally never seen a celebrity doing normal stuff like shopping and drinking meal replacement shakes, even though I hang out all over London like a lost urchin with a curly mullet. So, I decided to ask some other people to email me with what they’ve seen celebrities doing, and I think I have done better than NOW magazine (seriously, the best they had last week was two BB6 people or something shopping for sausage rolls at Greggs. Guffaw.)
John Frieda was giving bowl cuts to kids on my ruff lundun estate and insuring them that they look just like Ziggy/Zammo, just sans the frizz…All the working class kitchen sink grit of his Polish ancestry shines through…NO. I tried to just say no but free haircuts only happen twice: once from publicity-hungry celebrities and the other in the Army. I’m too young to die, so I chose the ‘accept offer from Sheer Blonde creator’ option. I am going to be called soft forever, but thats ok because I work at B&Q and my sister’s bastard son was box 16 on Deal or No Deal once…so I must be straight.
(I actually think he was very brave to email us with this picture…after all, there is a place where people with teeth like his often end up…it starts with Beachy and ends with Head)
Richard Bacon was eating errrm a bacon sandwich outside a synagogue in North London. Incensed our group of friendly Jewish lawyers…I would’ve confronted him there and then but we must be home before sundown on a Friday (ready for Jonathan Ross presumably).
(Another brave, brave soul who – rather than confront Bacon on his crime for fear of sinning – actually decided to call a lawyer and try to settle away from court for a great deal of his assets (flat, car, signed poster of Rachel Stevens). Good on you Mr’s Chace, Crawford , Taylor , Momsen, Leighton and Meester).
From: lindsaylohan@
icantgetlaid.nu
Hiii Hannah ❤
Saw your best UK export since like, the Queen, that sexy Cat Deeley snogging a butch woman in LA…no one noticed because said butch woman was probably C.D’s effeminate identikit lover JACK HUSTON. I’m definitely not jealous that she is going out with someone who is 89% Johnny Depp and 11% Morticia Addams, because I am a bonafide lesbian. No 89% men allowed! A woman needs a man like a fish needs a tricycle! xXx ps: that said, any directors I can hang with y’know, get me some film roles maybe? Ten year hiatus sucks when your Coke Fund runs dry, eh?
(Good choice, Linz <3, don’t think you’ve really been the same since you did Freaky Friday. Maybe it was that time you spent as Jamie Lee-Curtis…)
Hey Harriet J Davids i super love your website…I’m a 13 year old girl who is definitely not a 50 year old man LOL. Anywho, KStew and TLautz buying garlic and rabbits paws and copies of the Mormon biblein this totally hip and uber ironic shop called like yeah I dont remember because I picked heroin and Oreos for breakfast. Bad choice. But like, you should keep yourself safe before an interview with a vampire and such, bbz…sorry, I hear my goddamn blackberry… must dash, it could be one of the girls from The Hills, i put my PIN on a facebook group and have been so popular ever since LOLZ – *gunshot*
(It’s funny how much she looks like a stock image…maybe she is a model…or more likely she works in a video store like one of the sad kids in Scream, desperately downloading Neve Campbell screensavers for special time. I like inappapropriate italics.)
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ANYWAYS, moving swiftly on – THANKS AGAIN – Cathryn Innocent & I have started an exciting, brand new, never seen before website in the past month!
BELLEJAM.com is a place where us two crazy gimps hope to engage and entertain our readership with photojournalism, reviews, etc…its a HANNAHJDAVIES offshoot so I know that if you like this, you will LOVE Bellejam.com!!
Log on if only for my review of the J Depp/C Bale film Public Enemies!
(Image: C. Innocent)
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Bands I’ve seen – Jul 09 – o2 wireless festival, london; featured great performances from Kanye West (electriying even solo) and the Noisettes among many others. Fun day out, got plenty of freebies and had Domino’s from a van…
(Fan photography by myself – Shingai from the Noisettes shortly before a massive wardrobe malfunction rendered her indecent for a period. My friend and I were pretty close up as you can see…singing along and invariably gaining cigarette burns and beer in our respective hair [especially during Calvin Harris]. All good fun though…)
+++ MORE MORE MORE: coming soon when the Bellejam.com girlies (Cathryn and myself) go to the Underage Festival with !!! I can’t wait to chat artistes with Santo/igold and enjoy some Dubstep from Rusko & Caspa!I’ll keep posting after the festival!
Til next time, bonne nuit (yes, I teach French on the side)
x x x x
PS: massive massive huge congratuwelldone to this woman:
…if you’re not sure who she is and you are under the age of 30, then you maybe you should consider a career in caving…i mean that in the nicest way possible for such a facety remark. K to the Rissi!!
I’m doing exams. Yaaaay! Not. Except, maybe it should be yaaaaay, because in 13 short days I get my freedom and a summer packed full of fun (hopefully) and change (definitely).
So here we go: short and sweet.
I’ve done a bit of redecoration with the site this month…the poll on the right is where you can tell me if I’ve made the right choice or not by going all scarlet woman on your asses! Ok, I just chose the same colour as my nail polish if I’m being honest here.
I’m ever the recycler, sooooo lets hear what I thought of The Wire back on May 15th when I sent this email to an unnamed music publication:
“The Wire is a massive in-joke.
I actually think said Wire is an allegory alluding to the metal garden implements which non Wire fans will all eventually use to end the lives of those who persists in labelling said ‘gritty and unmissable’ drama as errrm ‘truly unmissable’ and ‘totally gritty’, as though they were born with a copy of the Daily Mail’s Weekend magazine in their mouth.
And…breathe.”
I guess I just have a fear of time moving on without me…new crazes and hit TV programmes and nail polish colours which I have yet to try and will therefore brand hideous and so last season in order to appear the belle du jour. Take Gossip Girl. Tried the book – didn’t like it much so didn’t finish it. Whilst I’m wondering whether to dare to wear a denim jacket to a festival with new booties a la Kate Moss or Daisy Lowe or someone, other girls are watching GG.
”]I’m not. So I brand GG “a poor girl’s [name of programme I am watching], and move on. Bad move, because next week people are swooning over Ed Westwick. I swoon as well, and start to wonder if GG is not a bad programme after all. I watch a little . It’s a bit of fun. Leighton Meester’s parents were drug smugglers according to Wiki. She is the ‘new’ underdog TV beauty…and I am about two years late.
Villain of the month: Why Barrymore is not my kind of person:
You might think this is a harsh way to start anything.Too subjective, too personal, too much of a bad pun. Why not pick on some of the other villainous creatures clogging up rehab centres in Copacabana? Have I ever met the man? No. Fortunately. But Susan Boyle has, and she is an incredibly talented individual. Britain’s Got Talent is usually a show which I stay well away from. I hate tacky programming BUT in a time of recession, male MPs claiming for tampons and such, SuBo and co. have provided some great entertainment. No, she didn’t win, but she will still have an amazing career in musical theatre, that I am certain of. As a great lover of BGT and musicals and therefore, SuBo, I was incensed to see the clip below. Yes, it was a long time ago. But Michael Barrymore is still a first class idiot for the way he acted when he ‘discovered’ Susan, who could’ve long been a star if it wasn’t for the arrogance of jumped-up tv ‘personalities’ like himself.
Hero of the month: How I was saved from agony by a pair of…
My friend’s Plimsolls. They’re having a renaissance among women, as I’ve noticed lately. However, I’m a fool, and chose to ignore this trend and wear heels to a party that ended up circumventing around a park. Luckily said friend is a boy, and they know everything. Said plimsolls were worn from that point onwards, and blisters were less inflamed than usual.
I think the chavtastic gif says it all. Channing Tatum has been claimed by them since we first saw him play the chauvanist but loveable hunk with a feminine side in Step Up. Went to see this guy in “Fighting” last (Orange) Wednesday. Bad film to say the least…token Hispanic girl played by a woman who I have seen play plenty of token Hispanic girls didn’t even brighten up the film on which I later Tweeted:
Fighting is a rip off of the classic violent underdog tale. Wooden and stunted plotless melee.
He gets the pity vote for eye-candy of the month, purely because he used to model for A&F and has obviously been taking acting classes at the same place as his cynical Senorita.
…And here you were thinking I was overaxaggerating. I might not have been raised by animals to sing Disney songs this
month, BUT I did have a great month regardless. My new nickname is Mowgli – given by a dear friend but disliked nonetheless. Why can’t a girl be a bit free with her massive curly hair and poor make-up regime, without being compared to a fictional eunuch, eh?
Anyhow, I digress: this month I appeared on the popular BBC programme Question Time, which was a laugh-and-a-half
…okay, it was a serious show featuring political prowess BUT it was as close to TV fame as I’m gonna get now that Jungle Run is a distant memory. I always wanted a bike/scooter/Gameboy colour.
Question Time was a great experience, and one that I won’t forget in a hurry despite not getting my massive gob on TV. And I met David Dimbleby (legend) who listened to my views on the control of policing despite being on his way off to the pub 🙂
X women at the X crawl/bad attempt at timely Marvel pun?
←
Anyways, this month I also went down to the Camden X Crawl for the lovely Artrocker.tv. You can read all about my exploits with my great friend Cathryn Innocent of Cathryn photography here. The X Crawl was a great event, hence my piece, and great photos like this poser with My Passion bassist and general sweetheart Simon Rowlands ↓
I have now decided, however, that based on that experience I am never leaving home sans pen, paper and BlackBerry ever again, having made a crazeee dash to Sainsbury’s for interviewing supplies. Once and never again…I had difficulty self-scanning my items, as always…
Just to reiterate, click above for the article and read ALL ABOUT IT. 🙂
Here’s a humorous picture of me to lighten the mood of this thoroughly disjointed entry:
Shall I go blonde? Hmmm…either way, dressing as Alice In Wonderland for my friend Emily’s birthday party (British themed) was a true eye-opener to the great hair debate. Suddenly I was crazily energetic and carefree…no longer a sensible, coy brunette…
Actually, I think I look a bit like Dolly Parton myself…
I feel slightly lazy today due to flu (not of the swine variety, hopefully), so here’s something I cooked up earlier, a review of Mad Men, a show which I love so dearly. It’s in a classy font, and not-so-subtly followed by pictures of this month’s ‘Old Man Crush’, Jon Hamm. It’s a fantastic show – BBC4, 10pm, Tuesdays are the place to be for the vintage stuff (which unfortunately has to end next week as the magnificent 2nd season draws to a close)…
Truly MADly Deeply
Mutually Assured Delight has swept over my TV screen, as I’ve prepared to stage some wholly pretentious conversations about advertising, glamour and aestheticism. Yes, I’ve been watching Mad Men for all of twelve weeks, and I’m gripped.
Dapper men (such as the gorgeous protagonist Don Draper, played by Jon Hamm), Brycreemed to the max and trying it on with their secretaries, their clients’ wives or whoever happens to be nearest to the Xerox: check. The underappreciated wives; neglected whilst their husbands devise great copy for Clearasil, or ‘spend a little time’ with the aforementioned floozies: check. The deficient 2.4 children, putting the nuclear into nuclear family, making cocktails for mummy and daddy, and being berated in a terrific style for asking such uncouth classics as “are we rich?” Check.
Mad Men has stolen my Tuesday nights and transported them into a bourgeoisie world, which smells of smoke and sex and classy instrumentals. It honestly looks like a real 1980s made-for-tv-movie set in the 50s; such is the realism, the costumery and the expert camerawork. Mad Men is the truth behind both the tension and allure of the office, and I would give anything to be part of a fantasy which includes Elnett in a starring role.
—
Old Man Crush status = in progress.
Stuff I like this month:
1 – Lush beauty stuff – nuff said. It’s LUSHious. and most of the products look like fudge…
2 – Festivals – counting down the days to Reading ’09!
3 – Afghani food – for the world food lover
4- My new banner, which is slightly stretched but very beautiful:
AND,
STUFF I DONT!
1 – Exams. I know that’s a stupid thing to say because we all NEED qualifications, but its the stress and hypochrondria that gets me!
2 – Swine flu. Just ‘cos.
3 – Weird coldcallers. You know who you are! I’ll ave ya for dinner!
Dear friends, frenemies, and casual readers: this month’s issue (Mar/Apr) is focused on music, not least because I have managed to nab rising indie-pop singer/songwriter and general rainbow of joy Ken Kobayashi for a bit of an interview… there’s also a smattering of stuff arriving in the F.U.N Directory page in the next day or so, so keep your eyes on hannahjdavies.com!
Ken Kobayashi is not only a friend of mine but also the artist behind the album My Big Foot Over The Sky, currently available through his MySpace page for purchase as an EP, and via iTunes for download!! Or, try before you buy and listen to the whole album here on Ken’s official website!
Hannah J Davies: You seem to have created something which is such a great listen that I’m having trouble putting into one category or another. It’s a bit like you’ve taken the idea of Air’s song ‘Alone In Kyoto’, spanned it in a washing machine with a keyboard, added a few scoops of so-called ‘indie guitar’ and hung it out to dry on a summer’s afternoon. Is this a fair analysis or can you do better? Ken Kobayashi: Hahaha. That’s good way of putting it…I’ve always liked artists who mix different genres and who develop new music. I am glad to hear that I’ve done that too, and yes, Indie music and Air are certainly key influences in the album. I’m not sure about putting a keyboard into a washing machine, but I like the pictures your mind comes up with. HJD: Thanks, actually for anyone reading this, don’t put your Casio in the machine! Anyhow, has the fact that both of your parents have been involved in the music industry had an impact on you? [Ken’s parents have been successful recording artists in their own right]. Essentially, do you feel under pressure to produce deep, avant-garde music rather than disposable pop because of your parents’ influence? Can you see yourself performing at more commercial events, doing sponsorship deals etc. if you hit the big time? KK: No I don’t feel under pressure. My parents weren’t that famous as musicians, [in the UK] so I’m definitely able to take things easier than, let’s say Sean Lennon. Also I am happy that my parents’ music is quite different from what I do. It’s more interesting that way, and I hope my music is not “disposable pop”, regardless of who my parents are. On your last point: look at Johnny Rotten. When I recently saw him in an advert for (Country Life) butter, it was hard to believe that he was among the pioneers of punk. Let’s face it, musicians are people like everyone else, and they will take the money – depending how good the offer is, of course – no matter how deep or undeep their music is.
Johnny’s not-so-rotten commercialism:
HJD: Indeed…I understand that you grew up in London, Tokyo and Berlin, which must have been quite an experience. Where did you draw your musical influences from in these (incredible) cities? KK: It was a challenging experience. I was born in London and I’ve spent most of my life here. So lots of my influences come from what I’ve heard in London. But it was not like I was literally listening to Japanese music when I was in Japan and German music when I was in Germany.I think it’s more complex than that. But of course it made me happy when I found good artists from Germany or Japan, because relating to these countries is also a part of my heritage. It’s hard to determine exactly which people, artists, literary figures and other things have specifically influenced me….but hopefully people get the multicultural feeling when they listen to my music. I would enjoy that. HJD: Where does the title for your debut album, ‘My Big Foot Over The Sky’ come from? It sounds almost religious?Hahaha. It doesn’t mean anything! I was talking to a friend about the album title and I said “something surreal would be cool….like “my big foot over the sky””, and he said, “that’s actually a good album title”. So it became the title.HJD: Nice story, I think you’re friend should get some royalties… On the topic of people, who – musically or otherwise – has been your biggest inspiration to become a musician? KK: I guess all the artists I liked when I grew up….artists like The Beta Band, Number Girl, Chemical Brothers Oasis, Beck, Air, Asian Dub Foundation. They made me want to become a musician. I really liked their music – they made my childhood so much better. Music always has been important to me. So I started to hope I could provide the same positive feeling to other people by making music.
Mr Ben – Ken Kobayashi
HJD: Positivity seems to be the undertone to your song Mr Ben (which chronicles the life of a city worker in need of a break from his mundane life of ‘going to the Underground’). It even seems a fitting anthem to the current economic recession? Has coupling your musical career with your university studies been stressful for you as well at times? KK: That’s a funny remark! Hmm….well Mr. Ben is certainly stressed out, but for me the main point in the song is his feeling of being “lost” or “confused” in his daily life, which happens to many people at certain stages of their life. I enjoy what I am doing at the moment, and I know what I want to do in the near future. So in that sense I feel quite different from Mr. Ben…at least for now. HJD: Who would be your ideal artists to collaborate with, and what would you say if they are reading this?KK: I know quite a few very talented musicians in London who are also nice people, like The Thirst, The Duloks, Perfect People, Tin Can Telephone, Hanjiro and so on. It would be great to do something with any of them. HJD: Well the version of ‘Karaoke’ you performed at your album launch with Mira from The Duloks was very good, so a side-project would be great! Obviously it matters what your fans and critics think, but how would you sum up your debut album in 10 words or less…? KK: Punky, grime-y, dubby, New-waveish, broken drum and bassy electronica. HJD: You write all of your own songs. Do you find the writing process difficult sometimes? Where do you get your ideas from mostly? KK: It wasn’t difficult nor was it easy. I played some chords on the guitar and whenever a catchy melody came into my head (and my mouth), I recorded it and later produced it. I think I need to learn music theory to write more stuff though. HJD: Now for my ‘wildcard’, as I’ve actually been been dying to know…what exactly is a ‘Magic Jar’? Is it a metaphor or would it be possible for you to draw it for me? KK: Hahaha. I wrote the song originally in Japanese and used the word “mahoubin” in the song, which refers to a thermos bottle for drinking hot tea or hot chocolate outdoors. “Mahoubin” literally translates as“Magic Jar”, and I thought magic jar sounded better than “Thermos Bottle” or “Vacuum Flask”.It's magic, you know... HJD: It certainly does! You’ve played a lot of gigs over the past year, where has been your most memorable gig and why?KK: Last year was a very good year for my band and me. After we formed as a group, we played many shows. I’d never played that many gigs in one year. I think that the best gig was the launch party for the album, which was in February. There were three fantastic bands playing for me. Lots of people came and the atmosphere was great. I’m very happy I was able to organize the event, and I was probably one of the happiest people on Earth that evening.HJD: It really was a great night, with support from the aforementioned Thirst, Hanjiro and Telegrams. You play live as ‘Ken Kobayashi and Friends’ with a band despite being a soloist. Are your bandmates also looking to form solo/band musical careers themselves, or are they happy to be part of team Kobayashi for now?KK: I recorded most of the album on my own. But when it came to playing shows, obviously it would have been boring to do it alone on stage. So I asked some of my friends to join me. I’m really thankful to my band members, because they’ve spent a lot of time on this project and we have really had a good time. All of my band members have cool solo stuff, so you can find them on my top friends list on MySpace. But yes, we’ll continue to play as “Ken Kobayashi and Friends” for a while because now the album is out.Living it on my own: Ken Kobayashi in a rare solo image...the band were somewhere, though! Image: Jules Nandra.HJD: Finally, if I told you tomorrow that you couldn’t be a musician anymore, what career would you plump for instead? KK: Hmm….I have no idea. Well the good thing about music is that you can always do it, professionally or not. And with things like MySpace and Youtube you can distribute your music easily today. So I will be doing this all of my life…even if you tell me not to! *************************************************************************************************
…of Hannahjdavies.com. Sigh in relief, breathe deeply, sigh again. Read 🙂 How I’ve missed writing! I’ll be back on February 16th (yes, double dose this month), in a collaboration with the photographer from the feature below!!:
– INNOCENT IN AN INNER CITY SENSE
Hope you’re well…I certainly am! Yesterday was spent adding 98 – yes, 98 – obscure songs to my iPod from Nick Drake to *NSYNC, whilst today I became a model-cum-photography-assistant whilst helping the fabulous Cathryn Photography to comprise a set which I nicknamed ‘Playtime’ because we had regressed towards the swings, roundabouts and monkey bars of a park we often frequented in our time of extreme youth.
It was incredibly cold, despite the little glimmers of sunlight of which were bouncing off Cathryn’s lense. She’s a newbie on the scene, but you wouldn’t guess it – the way she squints whilst looking for the perfect shot and occasionally gives us our marching orders is throughly Vogue. She has comprimised a mental list of some shots, utlising props such as a copy of To Kill A Mockingbird and a satin cushion. Model one (but hardly Models One) is me, and I’m dressed in an attire which pages homage to punk rock and Ronald McDonald (yes, as it is an FAQ that is my real hair).
Rachel – model two – was styled more like an abandoned prom night date/Fred Perry employee, but still managed to look gorgeously waif-like. She has the kind of toussled curls which are the envy of GHD users everywhere, unfortunately for me. The wind keeps lashing my curls across my eyes (ouch!) and mouth (sticky, eww) but the shoot still turns out to be rather fun, and an eye-opener to the predicaments of a model.
Pout or smile?
Lipstick or gloss?
To the left….or to the right?
It’s enough to make me reach of a bottle of (Laura) Bailey’s…
-DON’T CHA WISH YA GIRLFRIEND WAS A FREAK MACHINE LIKE ME? PROBS NOT.
On another note, here is the amazing ‘Freak Machine’ by The 9000…and if you look very closely at around 1:55 you’ll spot me on the right. This was my first – and possibly last – experience of being in a music video, and it is a pretty damn good one. Like Daft Punk, Justice, etc? Then check this out…and be sure to laugh at our super slow facial movements:
I received a jiffy bag this week, and inside was a pre-release copy of ‘My Big Foot Over The Sky’ by the wonderful Ken Kobayashi. Of course, I’ve played it half to death, put it onto my ancient iPod and choreographed a dance to it which would make the Beyonce team’s eyes water, and am aching to tell you all about it next month! Expect not even a soupcon of malice towards this record from me, basically…
Tarts – Bare legs, long boots, a cami, shorts and a kaftan. In the middle of winter. Our thermostats have obviously been installed in America mode with Barack Obama now King of The World. Chavvy.
Tartan – still doing it for me, even after a cold winter. Just don’t team clashing tartans or put tartan with its younger brother, check…you might look like one of those twins from Skins…
Primark – ‘slave labour’ from Manchester to Mumbai. Seams that come apart after a few days. Itchy cloth. Shoplifting year 7s. Uncool.
Primates – Konnie Huq’s voice as she introduces us to Zoo Days on Channel 5. Makes Beanie Babies look passé tbh…
Squeaky doors – lubrication for the nation…please??
Sliding Doors – just everything about chance meeting sets my heart a flutter and restores my faith in humanity. I’ve been saved from verbal abuse by a lionheart in Lyle and Scott, and even got a free lolly from a neighbour I’d never met. Oh, and I appeared in a music video cos I was in the right place at the right time…
Skins – dodgier than a week old kebab… stay away unless you want to catch the mental equivelent of salmonella.
Skin – it feels really nice with a light spritz of Body Shop’s coconut oil cream…except I keep wanting to lick my arms.
Evening dudes, bettys and those who know that Hollister is just a dimly lit Primark warehouse. Honestly, I thought there had been a powercut on my first visit to ‘HCO’…
Imagine my shock then, when I found a massive queue of teens waiting to get into the Westfield branch of Hollister on Saturday 10th January. It’s not that I dont rate their clothes, but well…would you queue for an hour or two for a few 60% cotton hoodies soon to be worn by everyone in West London?
Anyways, I love fashion immensely, although in the winter I know how tempting it can be to shrivel up and pile on the clumpy, bumpy and clashing layers.
I seriously mean like this:
You can make me whole (cream) again...
MY TIPS AW 08 – SS 09 (sorry for any sideways images, Photobucket is being annoying):
1) Big, fat leather belts:
I got mine ↓
courtesy of an attic clear-up at home, although these daddies can be snapped up everywhere.
Wear with jeans (if your loops arent big enough then put your baggy jeans on, pull them up quite a bit and then secure the belt over your top…just dont give yourself a wedgie doing this!!!) or a loose gypsy skirt – these are really cheap but look lovely with real leather accessories and boho jewellery, which is currently making a revival.
For cash payments, This Next belt is a gorgeous alternative to a vintage find …try attacking it with some sandpaper and leather balm for an aged look, or just leave it upstairs for 10 years a la moi…alternatively, splurge with this belt by Shane…the bird foil is very antique-look and the kind of pretty usually found in an ornately drawn biology book; just don’t mess around with the leather on this too much as it is a pretty expensive buy!!
2) Tartan:
Tartan is still surely the best thing to have come out of Scotland since, well, ever! I know, I know, I just destroyed hundreds of years of Scottish history with a single blow. Seen in SS 08, its stilll doing the rounds for SS 09!!
My family (Davies) tartan, is below ↓ however I’m much more of a fan of red tartan.
A bow, such as this Asos steal at £8 will bring a touch of Celtic class to your outfit without being too much of a distraction. With a simple tee, leather jacket, dark jeans and some kooky heels, this would for make an excellent midwinter ensemble.
With everyone getting in on the act, The Observer printed this gorgeous pic of photographer du jour Alice Hawkins in a lovely tartan prom dress with netting:
I’ve gotten in on the act by finding some ceilidh-ing/clubbing/coffeeing pieces of tartan in my very own wardrobe.
Example one: my TK Maxx shoes – Babyshams – which are easily copied, again at Asos.
Example two: my tartan skirt, stolen from my mum, which can be reproduced by either scowering charity shops of visiting the high street.
Example three: my tartan cross-body bag, which I have found is incredibly roomy and has lovely leather straps. For just £15 at the Topshop sale I dont think I could’ve found a prettier, redder or more Scottish sack.
Currently waiting on a GREEN tartan dress from the ASOS sale – in the meantime I will try and stay away from this increasingly addictive print!!
3) Crazy corsages
Beg, borrow and steal bits and pieces for your corsage…here’s one I made earlier!!
Whoops, HERES one I made earlier:
You’ll need:
-Badges (i like ones from galleires, like the Tate or high street stores)
-Ribbon/Sequin bows
-Buttons
– Chain (optional)
-Stickers (can be added or removed from the tee underneath)
Get them all together, mess about a bit and dont be afraid to prick yourself a few times in order to get the positioning of your trinkets perfect!!
4) Power dressing
I sometimes wear a suit jacket with jeans and a tee. This look works for pretty much anything – interviews, shopping, family events, or something more formal. In the pic below I’ve styled it with an oversized tee and a chain-strap bag.
To fit in with this season’s fabulous patriotic trend, I would recommend this union jack chain-bag from Paul’s Boutique at ASOS. It is adorable and boasts an animal print interior – another of my faves this year. Sometimes I wonder if Iam Edie Sedgwick/a bubble car from another psychadelic planet…
Anyway, dress like a mod and swing this off your Vespa handlebars (not advisable):
5) Costume-cocktail
An expensive dress shouldn’t have to require top-class accessories. Gems and jewels are easily faked, and as tacky as crystals might sound, a Victorian-style sparkler which can be thrown off after the party rather than lost down the toilet bowl is a plus. CC Skye make the best bling – their enamel bangles in particular are on trend. Fake the look of their leather double wrap bracelet by doubling a Topshop headband (you know the one, the one with the gold loops on it!!) around your wrist for LA style without lalaland pricing.
Style doesn’t have to be complex to be cool, and I hope I’ve shown you the basics of my AW 08 – SS 09 wardrobe. Also loved are:
-high waisted jeans (still around from SS 08)
– tailored trousers
– snuggly coats and cashmere scarves, both of which can be found cheaply during sale time. Good quality scarves – including vintage University scarves – will bring a touch of interest to a dark coat/boot combination.
– Sheepskin boots (Ugg, Emu etc). Nuff said. Expensive but worth it for warm, dry feet in times of snow
– Primark basics – tank tops will eventually lose their colour so why not buy them from old Primark…worn-in ones can look good layered with interesting buys from abroad such as kaftans and bikinis in the impending summer months.
Bisous,
x x x x
-Currently listening to and loving this week: ♥
The Beatles – Rubber Soul
Radiohead – The Bends
Destiny’s Child – Number 1s
-Thoughstream:
Stop the Gaza conflict, bring back X-Fire (best TV show ever as of 2001), tape Prince Harry’s gob shut!
Rant one: Yes commenters, I can see your email addresses and you don’t even realise!
This reminds me of when I was told during my work experience at NME not to handle some of the weirder fanmail that the writers receive.
Q: Slated some shitty four piece from Dagenham?
A: Yes? Here’s a box of my excrement, then.
Lovely. ♥
Anyways, here’s the gorgeous and articulate (and married) Johnny Depp…I love him sooo much that I’m going to post a random and wholely pointless picture of him right….here…
Anyways, yesterday I mentioned Monsieur Depp unintentionally whilst telling you about the fantastic Sweeney Todd soundtrack, which you can buy online or steal if you’re one of the people interested in something I will cover in a sec.
Today I watched the psychological cat-and-mouse antics of his characteristically offbeat 2004 offering ‘Secret Window’ which was actually far, far better than I’d imagined it would be, given the awful reviews which surrounded it at the time of release.
It was panned, quite frankly, but if you’re into Donnie Darko, The Butterfly Effect or maybe just Psycho then give it a try…its a 3-star thriller.
Currently listening to:
I know, I’m a horrible middle-class bitch aren’t I? What about all those poor people who’ve lost their jobs, right? Where’s my sense of socialism and cameraderie for the lower classes?
Actually I think tact is 70% off at Poundland this week.
Currently reading:
the Independent’s Life section. Startlingly interesting today, actually, what with an online piracy article (aXXo who?), plenty of stuff about MySpace (remember them?) making a movie, a hilarious problems page, some subjective fashion advice (I just bought a heap of tartan and am now being told to throw it away basically) and more (who knew that symbolics.com is the oldest website out there, eh? etc)
The irony: just read about the pirating catastrophe online, yet I watched ‘Secret Window’ online today, with dodgy kanji subtitles aplenty…they didn’t marr Depp’s beauty however…ahhh…
*Following on from my other link yesterday, here is more satire and goodness for the soul. Yes, I am mixed race, therefore I can do this and not get in too much trouble.
Bisous; laugh a little and play nice! I’m off to listen to endless euthanasia debates on LBC ‘cos I’m cool like that
(Image: 
!!! I can’t wait to chat artistes with Santo/igold and enjoy some Dubstep from Rusko & Caspa!I’ll keep posting after the festival!
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Fighting is a rip off of the classic violent underdog tale. Wooden and stunted plotless melee.
and most of the products look like fudge…
Tarts – Bare legs, long boots, a cami, shorts and a kaftan. In the middle of winter. Our thermostats have obviously been installed in America mode with Barack Obama now King of The World. Chavvy.
I’ve gotten in on the act by finding some ceilidh-ing/clubbing/coffeeing pieces of tartan in my very own wardrobe. 
Hannah J Davies 